No Go Snow

My weather app is very eager to please, but also very wrong.

WEATHER APP: It's snowing! Right now! Look out for the snow!

AWKWARD MORMON GIRL: Gosh! (goes outside) Um...weather app...it's not snowing.

WEATHER APP: Snowing!

AWKWARD MORMON GIRL: ...no.

WEATHER APP: Right now!

AWKWARD MORMON GIRL: ...no.

WEATHER APP: Oh.

...

...

...

WEATHER APP: In one hour!

In short, I woke up 5 a.m. the other day, thinking I would have ride the bus to work to avoid the winter storm my weather app eagerly promised.

Did it snow? No. No, it did not. Not when I woke up. Not when I went back to sleep due to a lack of snow. Not when I ate breakfast two hours later. Not when I left my apartment at 7:40. Not on my way to work. Not while I was working (I sit near a window). Not when I left work at 5 p.m.

WEATHER APP: Snowing! Snowing soon!

An hour later...still nothing.

Finally, late that night, it started snowing. I set my alarm for 5:00 a.m. again and checked my app when I got up. The app said it had stopped snowing, so I went back to sleep.

When I did get up and went to work, I discovered that even though it hadn't snowed for hours, most of the roads were not sufficiently cleared, and it was Snowcopalypse. Everyone drove to work in a manner reminiscent of Bambi learning to skate.

Now, in addition to the weather app, I'm constantly checking road conditions and traffic times, trying to accurately gauge what kind of fate I'll meet whenever I step outside.

In short, winter is no fun.