How to Survive a Crisis

If you're facing a real crisis, like an earthquake or a fire, then I can't help you. You're dead.

Sorry!

But if you're facing an emotional crisis (like An Interpersonal Crisis), then I might be of some help.

So...in case of a non-earthquake and non-fire crisis, here are some helpful tips:

Take care of the basics. Have you eaten? Have you slept? Have you had a glass of water to replace all the liquid you lost through your tears? Have you brushed your hair? Have you fed your cat? Or your child? Make sure you do those things. They're the last things you want to do right now, but if you do them you'll have a higher capacity to face what you're facing. Promise.

Do what you normally do. Get yourself out of bed and go about your business. I know your world is spinning out of control. I know everything is terrible. But guess what? Routine helps. Usually. As awful as it is to do mundane tasks when you're completely devastated, it's arguably more awful to sit around and think of how devastated you are.

But don't overdo it. If you absolutely cannot do what you normally do, give yourself a break and relax. Go to your favorite Chinese buffet and read a book and pig out. Watch your favorite TV show. Read something uplifting and inspiring. The only caution with this is to be reasonable about it. You can't avoid your real life until you feel better because chances are you won't feel better for a while. But you can give yourself one evening—one day—one weekend where you do nothing except what you feel like doing. You just have to be disciplined enough to return to normalcy after your one whatever is over.

Surround yourself with people who care about you. Sometimes that involves actively seeking out friends and family. But. You'll be surprised at how many people can scent your troubles and will come flocking to you with little to no effort on your part. They will say nice things, visit you, bring you gifts, and hopefully let you vent to them. Be warned: some of them will give you advice. Some of the advice will not be applicable to you. Try not to be offended. They undoubtedly mean well.

Do things that make you happy, and plan things to look forward to. Again, be disciplined. Don't spend money you don't have; don't eat a ton of stuff that's bad for you or shirk your normal life in the pursuit of numbing pleasures. But...splurge a little. Live a little. Go out of your way to enjoy yourself. You need it.

Think about someone else. It sounds trite, but it really helps to lose yourself in someone else's problems. For one thing, it helps you feel valuable. For another, it keeps you from becoming completely self-absorbed and molasses-bitter.

Cut yourself some slack. You'll feel good for a few days. Maybe even a few weeks. Then something may happen that reminds you of your crisis, and you'll just fall to pieces. Guess what? You're grieving. The pain's going to come in waves, in fits and starts. Accept this. Learn to deal with it.

In other news, supposedly good fortune is coming my way.

Yes please.