Like Riding a Bike

Today Baby Brother and I went on a bike ride.

Every time someone says, "It's like riding a bike," about something that once learned I should remember the rest of my life, I always think, "Then it's hopeless!"

See, I had quite a bit of trouble learning to ride a bike. I didn't learn until I was eleven years old, and only then after much trouble and toil. I then used those skills for just a short time. The other day when I pulled out Little Brother's bike, it was my first time riding since I was thirteen, tops.

But Baby Brother wanted me to ride with him. When Baby Brother wants me to do something with him, I find it very hard to refuse. He's cute and little and has big eyes, like a puppy. Or an anime character. Or a hobbit.

My first time on a bike in years and years went okay. Baby Brother seemed to have way more confidence in my biking skillz than I did. When we passed some hardcore bikers wearing hardcore biking clothes, he commented, "We are not as good as them." I found it very gratifying that Baby Brother put me in the same class as himself, because in all honesty he bikes much better than I do.

There were some boons, though. When I found I wanted to move to the side, my bike moved to the side like magic. I didn't fall over. Eventually I even remembered to use the hand brake instead of stopping with my feet.

Close to the end of our ride, I heard this weird whump-whump sound.

"Probably that's a normal bike sound," I said to myself. Yet the farther I went, the worse it got, until it was like a pestle in a mortar: WHUMP! WHUMP! WHUMP! At least, that's how I imagine a pestle in a mortar sounds. Haven't ground much corn or herbs lately, myself.

Eventually I got off and looked at the tires. The back one had completely separated from the frame.

Aside from that incident and also aside from Little Brother's bike being uncomfortable (girl bikes seats are way more comfortable than boy bike seats, which makes no sense if you think about it), Baby Brother and I had a lovely time, such a lovely time that we've done it twice more since then.

The second time Baby Brother suggested I take Little Brother's old bike, which is a child-size bike instead of full-size. I clambered on it. Lo and behold, I fit. My knees felt like they were up to my ears, but I could pedal. Also lo and behold, the bike handled really well. I took it for a spin on the driveway.

MOM: (looks out the door) What are you doing?

AWKWARD MORMON GIRL: Little Brother's other bike is broken, so I thought maybe-

MOM: No.

I took a razor scooter. Let me tell you, that was a mistake. The scooters nowadays are nothing like the scooters back in my day. Man, the scooter I owned had hand brakes and a board big enough to put both feet on and glide. This razor scooter was tiny, and flimsy, and it had no power. Every time we reached a crack in the sidewalk, the wheels would slam against it instead of going over, nearly bucking me off.

Today's ride went much more smoothly. I took Older Sister's bike. Baby Brother had a successful run around the neighborhood and then went on the bike trail near our house.

One problem, though--the bike trail runs through a swamp. We were biking along, minding our own business, when suddenly we were passing through these swarms of mosquitos. Hordes of mosquitoes. Gangs of mosquitoes. It was like we were Jets and they were Sharks and we'd come into their territory and now we were having a rumble.

These mosquitoes, somehow they managed to attach onto my skin as I sped through them. Immediately I began to itch. And itch. And itch. These literal suckers were driving me crazy. So of course I began to blow on them. Which meant that I wasn't paying attention to where I was biking.

Terrible things happened in that moment. Terrible things like the mosquito didn't seemed fazed at all. And I just itched more. And I almost rode off the trail into the underbrush. And had I actually done that terrible thing, Baby Brother would have laughed.

He didn't get to laugh, though. Though he did get to when I rode into a heap of pinecones on the way home. So I laughed when he rode into a clump of vines. And then I ran into that same clump. And then he ran into some rocks. And a fence.

Let's just say Baby Brother and I are still learning.