Risks and But Ifs

A while ago, I got some advice from someone who is exceptionally qualified to give advice. I went to this person and told them that I was trying really hard in life. I was trying really hard to do what Heavenly Father wanted me to do, and I felt like I was doing what Heavenly Father wanted me to do. However, nothing was turning out well or, in some situations, turning out at all.

After spilling my guts about the five thousand things that were bothering me, this person said, "Stop saying 'but if.'"

And "'But if' is not God's way."

I was thinking about that just now because lately I've obsessing a lot about my social interactions or rather my lack thereof.

It's hard for me to connect with people. It's hard for me to make eye contact with them. It's hard for me to even go up and talk to someone I don't really know because I dislike small talk and I don't get a lot of emotional value out of speaking to strangers anyways. I tend to interrupt people when I'm excited. I tend to get intense.

All of these things form a pretty substantial barrier between me and the seven and a half billion other people in the world.

Every time I talk to someone who I don't know very well, it's a scary experience. Lately I've found myself walking towards conversations thinking, "I think this person likes talking to me, but if they don't, how would I know?"

The conclusion I've come to is that I can't know. So I guess my choices are either be safe and not talk to people, or talk to people and feel like I'm taking an enormous risk every time I do it.

Taking risks is hard enough without constantly questioning yourself and saying, "but if." Or saying "What if?" "What if?" will drive you to distraction. "What if?" will kill you. Just do the thing and find out what happens. In the long run, I usually don't regret taking risks, but I do regret letting opportunities pass me by because of my own inaction.