Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

What's this? What's this?!

The correct answer is, "Awkward Mormon Girl's hair."

Yes, yes, blah blah. I know you're all like, "You just posted a post bragging about your glorious long hair."

To which I say, "Yes, which means that I was obviously thinking about hair. Which means that you should have deduced that I was thinking about cutting my hair off. Which is a thing I did last week."

One of my reasons for cutting my hair off was that I'd like to look, if not my age, then somewhat closer to my age. People say, "You'll be glad that you're so young-looking when you hit thirty and you still look like you're twenty!" Be that as it may, right now I'm not always super glad that I look younger than I am. But you know what makes me look older and more sophisticated? Short hair. Short hair makes me look older and more sophisticated. So I determined to have my hair cut.

Question: How long was my hair before I cut it off?

Answer: Approximately 26 inches.

Question: How long is it now?

Answer: Much, much shorter. And I couldn't be more delighted! It turned out just as I dreamed it would.

Question: So do other people now think that you look older and more sophisticated?

Answer: Some have said so.

In fact, as I was leaving the gym today, I passed a group of guys hanging around the gym doors.

One of them asked, "Hey, how are you doing today?"

"Fine," I said, and I kept walking.

Behind me, I heard the guy say, "...at least 22!" My mind quickly guessed that one of the other guys had said something to him along the lines of, "Dude, you shouldn't be hitting on that girl! She's too young!" but that my new acquaintance had asserted that I was 22. 22?! No one ever guessed that high! I beamed and congratulated myself on the success of my new haircut.

Sure enough, one of the guys yelled after me, "Hey! How old are you?"

I called back my age. I heard the guy who'd talked to me yell, "I knew it! See, that's how you do it! When you see a beautiful woman, you have to say hello to her!"

I beamed again and congratulated myself on my haircut being successful in other ways than making me look older. Then I chuckled all the way home.