On Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day was named after St. Valentine, but nobody seems to care about that guy these days. So that leaves me in a grammatical crisis: do I call it "Valentine's Day" as in the day that belongs to Valentine? Or "Valentines Day" as in the day of the giving of the valentines? It's a puzzlement, I tell you.

I actually really like Valentine's Day. Obviously we should let people know that we love them more than once a year, but I do like the idea of a day honed particularly for that expression.

People tend to associate the day with romantic love only. They moan, "I'm single again on Valentine's Day?" Well, my friend, if you're one of those people, allow me to point out that at some point in life a great many people get married, and then from that point on they have someone to spend Valentine's Day with forever and ever. So actually, your number of Valentine's Days as a single person are probably limited. I would suggest making good use of these special-edition days. Since you don't have a romantic interest to focus on, maybe you should look out for other people who would appreciate gestures of platonic or familial love from you. Make as many people in your sphere of influence feel loved and appreciated on Valentine's Day as you possibly can within reasonable limits of expense, time, and effort.

Example: on what turned out to be her last Valentine's Day as a single person, La Petite brought me a card, a treat, and a stuffed frog. I was really excited that somebody had thought of me and tried to make my day special. Next year, you could be somebody's La Petite.

One last thought for you today: I'm not married. I've never been married. But I do know a lot of married people and so I've been speculating about what it might be like when I get there. Here's a thing I wrote in my journal that perhaps some other human in the world might find to be a useful perspective:

The truth is, is when marriage takes place you take all your flaws and insecurities and mistakes and sins and place them on the altar. Your spouse does the same. And you say to Heavenly Father, "Make us better than we are. We give away all these things to you. We sacrifice them all on this altar, so that we might be charitable and humble enough to become one and work together as one."

Anyways, happy day that belongs to St. Valentine and/or the day of the giving of the valentines. Whichever interpretation you prefer.

Risks and But Ifs

A while ago, I got some advice from someone who is exceptionally qualified to give advice. I went to this person and told them that I was trying really hard in life. I was trying really hard to do what Heavenly Father wanted me to do, and I felt like I was doing what Heavenly Father wanted me to do. However, nothing was turning out well or, in some situations, turning out at all.

After spilling my guts about the five thousand things that were bothering me, this person said, "Stop saying 'but if.'"

And "'But if' is not God's way."

I was thinking about that just now because lately I've obsessing a lot about my social interactions or rather my lack thereof.

It's hard for me to connect with people. It's hard for me to make eye contact with them. It's hard for me to even go up and talk to someone I don't really know because I dislike small talk and I don't get a lot of emotional value out of speaking to strangers anyways. I tend to interrupt people when I'm excited. I tend to get intense.

All of these things form a pretty substantial barrier between me and the seven and a half billion other people in the world.

Every time I talk to someone who I don't know very well, it's a scary experience. Lately I've found myself walking towards conversations thinking, "I think this person likes talking to me, but if they don't, how would I know?"

The conclusion I've come to is that I can't know. So I guess my choices are either be safe and not talk to people, or talk to people and feel like I'm taking an enormous risk every time I do it.

Taking risks is hard enough without constantly questioning yourself and saying, "but if." Or saying "What if?" "What if?" will drive you to distraction. "What if?" will kill you. Just do the thing and find out what happens. In the long run, I usually don't regret taking risks, but I do regret letting opportunities pass me by because of my own inaction.

It's All In the Cards

Hi everybody!

Y'all know my obsession with February 3rd. Well, once again, not a lot happened on this year's February 3rd, but I'm hopeful for next year.

Tonight I was looking for a comedic monologue I wrote in high school. Baby Sister wants to use it for an audition, but due to a mishap with the family computer there are no digital copies of it in existence. I have only one print copy, but I'm not sure where it is. So I pulled out my boxes of special things and started looking.

I started keeping a box of special things when I was, oh, maybe four years old. Since my love language is gifts, stuff is important to me, and some stuff I've kept practically my whole life. Inside are pictures from the program when I saw Toy Story on Ice eighteen or nineteen years ago, some notes Viola and I wrote during Anne of Green Gables, letters that Best Friend Boy sent me on his mission, a picture that Shutterbug once drew for me during class, my high school and college graduation announcements, minutes from Relief Society presidency meetings, and these Phineas and Ferb cards, among other things.

Yes, the one on the right does say "nephew" on it. Little Sister gave it to me for my birthday last year. Inside, it begins, "Thanks for being the best nephew I could have ever asked for!!!! You have exceeded my expectations of you." 

Digging a little deeper, I found more store bought cards from various loved ones, but I also found a ton of homemade cards. I found at least one homemade birthday card from each of my younger siblings. There was a hand-drawn Phineas and Ferb card from Baby Brother. A card from Little Sister with a drawing of a birthday cake on it that was probably from when we were both in elementary school. A card from Baby Sister cut in the shape of a dragon egg, from the year that the two of us were into this site where we could hatch virtual dragons. A card made by the notoriously grumpy Little Brother that says, "You are my sunshine!"

And these cards reminded me of something that I sometimes forget. Which is to say, life is hard and it's not fun fifty-two percent of the time. But regardless of those facts, I'm pretty lucky.

Caroll Spinney: The Man, The Myth, The Legend

For Christmas, Little Sister and Baby Sister got tickets for Little Brother and me to a live showing of I Am Big Bird, followed by a question-and-answer session with Caroll Spinney. Caroll Spinney, for all you non-Muppet people, is the original performer of Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch.

Now, there are Muppet fans crazier than me. I know of some people who are so obsessed with Muppets that they would spend their life savings on a clipping from Jim Henson's ficus plant. Not that Jim Henson had a ficus plant. That I know of.

Anyways, I'm not as into Muppets as some people. But they do have a special place in my heart and life. Muppet Treasure Island is my second-favorite movie; MuppetVision 3-D is one of my favorite non-roller coaster attractions at Disneyland and Disney World; I have my share of Muppet merchandise. This love of Muppets has led me to want to know more about the amazing men who perform them. So getting to see Caroll Spinney, the man behind characters that have been beloved to me since I was a kid? Priceless. A great gift. Little Brother and I were very excited.

Yesterday, January 29th, was the long-awaited day. The night before, I kind of freaking out. Getting from my workplace to Kingsbury Hall before the performance started was going to be pretty stressful, even if everything went as planned. But if things didn't go as planned...well, let's just say I filled my purse with all kinds of things. My glasses, in case one of my contacts ripped or was irritating my eye. My phone charger, in case my phone died. A piece of paper with the addresses of Kingsbury Hall and the parking lot, in case my phone navigation went crazy like it did at Viola's wedding. Nothing would come between us and Caroll Spinney. No, nothing.

Except bad snow. Or if my car had another problem. I couldn't prepare for those things except to pray that they wouldn't happen. By the time we were supposed to go, I was really stressed out.

Stressfully, I drove Little Brother and myself to get sushi at the Happy Sumo. Stressfully, I paid for the sushi. Stressfully, I drove us out of the parking garage. And stressfully, I dropped my parking garage ticket under my seat.

I almost had a heart attack and died, right there in the parking garage. But I managed to recover the ticket and remain alive. Until I couldn't find the parking garage exit and almost had another heart attack. And so on and so forth. With lots of incidents of almost-cardiac arrest, we inched through the dark, rainy streets of Salt Lake City until we reached Kingsbury Hall.

By the time we got there, I was so stressed out, I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to enjoy myself. But despite my misgivings, I parked Bernard in a parking space where we were joined by a lime-green car with a Kermit the Frog sticker in the window. I suspected the driver of this car was the kind of diehard Muppet fan I was describing earlier. There was probably a clipping of Jim Henson's ficus plant in the front seat.

We picked our tickets up from will call, went into the theatre, and sat down. And so the evening commenced.

First, there was the showing of the movie. It was a beautiful movie. Caroll Spinney is also a sort of artist-animator-cartoonist, and it looked like that either he had animated segments of the movie or someone else had animated them after his style. So it was a neat combination of home video, footage of Muppet productions, interviews, and animations of stories from Caroll's past.

My only complaint about the movie...well, I love Steve Whitmire. He is my favorite Muppeteer. Caroll Spinney actually discovered him. So at the portion of the movie when Jim Henson died and Steve Whitmire was chosen to play Kermit the Frog, Caroll started talking about Steve. I was excited because I thought I might hear some cool Steve stories. Caroll Spinney said something like, "He was a talented young puppeteer." Then they showed a clip of Steve Whitmire waving at the camera on a Muppet set or something. Aaaand that was the end of the Steve Whitmire portion of the movie. Boo.

But anyways, great movie. I laughed a lot and cried a lot and even coughed a lot after choking on my own tears. By the end of it, my stress had almost completely melted away. Although I already knew a lot of the things they mentioned in the movie, I learned a lot I'd never heard before. Also, in the words of Little Brother, "Caroll Spinney and his wife are the cutest couple ever!"

The movie ended. Everybody applauded. And then from the back of the theatre, Caroll Spinney and his wife Debra began to walk down the aisle, and everybody leapt to their feet and applauded some more.

"That was so weird!" Little Brother said during the brief intermission between the movie and the question-and-answer. "We just saw them on the screen, and then they were in the theatre!"

"Like MuppetVision 3D," I suggested.

"Caroll Spinney 3D."

Around us, everybody was chatting excitedly about the movie. I saw people raising their hands in the air and opening and closing their fingers in an imitation of the way Caroll puppeteered Big Bird, marveling at the skill and talent it takes to make a Muppet come to life. I knew that's what they were doing because I've often done it myself. The Muppeteers are among some of the greatest actors in the world. They not only do amazing acting, but they do it through a body that doesn't even belong to them. Acting is hard enough without going through an additional medium!

Then it was time for the Q&A. The mediator (who was some guy from KUED named Ken Verdoia who is probably famous but whom I don't care about) invited those of us with the not-so-good seats in the back to move closer, which we did with pleasure. Then Caroll and Debra came out, and everybody stood and applauded again. We would have stood and applauded for Caroll Spinney all day because Caroll Spinney.

So, they all sat down onstage. Debra Spinney had a gigantic purse, like maybe she had a phone charger and her extra glasses in there. But the gigantic purse was quickly forgotten as Ken Verdoia (whoever he is) started asking questions.

First, he asked a broad, sweeping question about Caroll Spinney's career.

Now, the movie talked about how Caroll met Jim Henson and ended up working for him. Caroll was performing at a puppetry festival in Salt Lake City. His act was a disaster, but Jim, who was watching, thought he handled it well, so he offered Caroll a job working on Sesame Street.

This was one of the animated portions of the movie. While we were watching it, I noticed that the animation of the theatre looked like Kingsbury Hall, right down to the murals on the wall. But my suspicions weren't confirmed until during the Q&A when Caroll said something like, "Well, the story begins here." He said that the performance had happened in Kingsbury Hall. "Jim was sitting right over there." He pointed.

And then I almost had a heart attack again because Jim Henson, one of my heroes, had been in this building! Wow!!!

I studied Caroll as he talked. He was wearing a green pants, a brown shirt, and a tan jacket. As for the rest of him...I don't have a picture, but this random picture from the Internet suffices.

I think that's even the same jacket!

He's about the same age as my grandmother, and he had the same tendency to start telling a story in the middle of another story. But never mind that; the audience ate up everything he said. He would occasionally go into Big Bird's voice as he talked, and the audience just couldn't get enough of that. There was more applause every time. Also, he had a very little-kiddish air about him. He talked about Snuffy as if he were real; he talked about all the puppets as if they were real. Which, you know, they are to so many people. But he had no self-consciousness about it whatsoever.

Ken Verdoia also took questions from the audience. There were two little kids who had brought puppets who asked questions. At their age, I probably would have asked dumb questions, or used my puppet to ask the questions. But these kids were way smarter than I was. One asked if Caroll had any advice for young puppeteers.

Caroll gave a pragmatic answer. Then Ken Verdoia started rambling on, saying something like, "Hold onto your dream...people will tell you you're crazy...and then when you become a puppeteer, hold onto something special..."

And I was like, "What are you talking about, Ken Verdoia? Nobody wants your advice. Nobody's even here to see you!" But then I realized he was trying to work up a bit of an intro segue thing, because out of Debra Spinney's gigantic purse came Oscar the Grouch!

Another random picture from the Internet.

I've heard a lot about the relationship between the Muppet and the Muppeteer, but this was my first time seeing it in action. As soon as he was out of the bag, Oscar said something grumpy. Caroll chided him, and Oscar turned around to Caroll and said, "Who are you?"

Later, somebody mentioned puppets.

OSCAR: I hate puppets!

CAROLL: He doesn't mean that.

The other little kid asked, "What makes an act funny?"

Being an improv comedian myself, I was especially interested in Caroll's response. Here's what he said: "You gain a lot from the audience. The audience is part of the show."

Anyways, Caroll and Debra shared stories with us. They talked about the work and some of the performers Caroll worked with. They answered some more questions from the audience and from Ken Verdoia. Soon, regrettably, the evening was over.

Ken Verdoia, I guess trying the whole thing altogether, was all, "That's the great thing about Big Bird. A bird teaches us how to be better people." And then Caroll and Debra left the theatre, and everybody stood up and applauded again.

So Little Brother and I left, awash in the magic of an amazing performer from an amazing tradition. We have no photos of this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so the way I'm trying to preserve this amazing experience is by turning it into this story. Memories fade, but stories can be read over and over. And better yet, they can be shared. So now that you've read this, it's kind of like you, too, got to go see Caroll Spinney: the man, the myth, the legend.

My Fourth Stitch Fix Experience

Okay, everybody. First off, this is my three hundredth and first post, so kudos to me for that.

Secondly, I got a Fix the week before Christmas, so I suppose I should tell you all about that thing. Get ready for badly lit photographs of clothing and my professionally baseless, unfounded opinions about them.

Last time I talked about Stitch Fix, I mentioned how my Fixes never ever come on Thursdays but I desperately want them to come on Thursdays. Well, this Fix actually came on a Thursday...probably because it was the week of that huge snowstorm. The storm undoubtedly slowed down the mail. So...yay storm?

For this Fix, I asked for something festive to wear to Christmas Eve lunch with my younger sisters. Here's what my cute little note said:

Hi Awkward Mormon Girl! I can't believe it's already December, this year has flown by! For a festive Christmas Eve outfit I thought you could wear the Amy Matto Swing Skirt paired with the Market & Spruce Sweater- I am assuming it might be chilly around then so wear this look with tights and a pair of boots. Still no luck on the polka dot jeans but I did have the Margaret M Pant with the polka dot print, these pants are great for work and can be dressed up for the holidays. Since you loved that cobalt blue color from the skirt in a past Fix I thought you would love the Collective Concepts blouse for a bold colored piece to wear with the Margaret M pants along with the Bay to Baubles Necklace- you can never have enough sparkle! I am looking forward to styling you in the New Year! Have a great holiday! -Jessica V

No Xo??? That's new.

My first reaction when looking at the stack of clothes was that none of it looked very festive. When I said "festive," I was thinking more along the lines of "red and gold and sparkly." Which means, therefore, that in the future when I'm looking for red and gold and sparkly, that's what I should specifically ask for. Lesson learned.

Amy Matto Bonnie Lace Detail Swing Skirt: The moment I pulled this skirt out of the box, I was like, "Hey, wait a minute!" The Seamstress got a Fix of her own back in November, and I was pretty sure that this exact same skirt was in her Fix. The Seamstress found this skirt to be a) not flattering, as the waistband was extremely tight and stretchy, as well as b) a little bit short for comfort as well as c) vastly overpriced for the quality. I concurred with her findings. I suspect this was a skirt that had been hanging out in Stitch Fix's inventory for a long time which they were desperate to get rid of, which made me feel like this Fix was less tailored to my taste and more impersonal. Verdict: Send back.

Market & Spruce Fierro Elbow Patch Crew Neck Sweater: This sweater did not go well with the skirt as suggested by Jessica V, mainly because of the way the skirt waistband settled. However, it had fun teal elbow patches, and I really liked the color, and it was super comfy. Plus, it was green, which is festive. Verdict: Keep.

Margaret M Emer Printed Knit Straight Leg Pant: First off, I still think saying "pant" instead of "pants" is pretentious. Secondly, I already have blue polka dot work pants. Thirdly, even if I didn't, I didn't like these enough to buy. Verdict: Send back.

Bay to Baubles Brinley Flower Gemstone Necklace: I really liked this necklace with the sweater. However, I knew I would never wear it with anything else. In the end, I decided I could find something just as good or better at Target. Verdict: Send back.

Collective Concepts Albert Button Down Blouse:: Pretty color, strange fit. I have a similar (red) blouse that I got at Ross for ten dollars, which made me less-than-eager to buy another, more pricey one. Verdict: Send back.

All in all, this Fix was a little disappointing. On the other hand, I got what I needed, which was something festive to wear on Christmas Eve. I wore some red jewelry with the green sweater, and it turned out to be a really fun look.

In other fun Stitch Fix news...over the weekend we had another storm around Hometown. On Saturday night, I had to cut short a fun evening with Viola so that I could make it home before the storm got too crazy. Getting home proved to be more difficult than I thought, and in the middle of making phone calls to family members I noticed an email from Stitch Fix that said, "$25 Credit is Yours!"

At first I didn't pay much attention to it, but when I opened it up later it said inside, "Haley's first Fix just shipped, so you've received $25 in credit!"

Then I realized that some delightful blog reader named Haley must have used my referral link to sign up for Stitch Fix! Thanks, Haley! When I get my springtime Fix in March, I'll think of you! As well as I can, anyways, since I don't think I actually know you.

Mercury

Speaking of car trouble, Little Sister just got a new car. It's a blue-green Mercury that she is calling Hermes.

We were discussing Hermes through text.

Little Sister: Yeah, it's a weirdly nice but temperamental car

Little Sister: And a shaking nightmare on the freeway

Me: One might say it's...mercurial.

Me: Ba dum ching!

Little Sister: HAHAHAH

Little Sister: did you just come up with that??

Me: Yes. Yes, I did.

Little Sister: I HAVE A GENIUS SISTER

I do have some mad pun skillz.

Little Sister: And I set that joke up literally perfect for you.

Little Sister: Good team

Me: Together, we could rock the comedy world.

A few minutes later...

Me: I have another one.

Me: When you're in your car and you're backing up, you should cry, "MERCURY IS IN RETROGRADE!"

Little Sister: Hahahahaha Okay pretty good but you probably stop now while you're ahead.

Goodreads Reviews

I have read a lot of not-so-great books lately. So I decided to try a function of Goodreads that I've never used before: reviews.

For kicks and giggles, here are some of my Goodreads reviews. There are spoilers within, so if you want to read these books and be surprised, you shouldn't read these reviews.

Review for The Last Siege by Jonathan Stroud:

This book was weird. Not weird like mystery meat casserole weird, but weird like when you order a taco expecting that there will be lettuce and cheese and tomatoes and maybe some guacamole on it, but there isn't anything inside the shell but taco meat, and it's not very good taco meat at that. That is what this book is like.

I loved the castle. It sounded very much like the Castello di Avio in Italy. I fell in love with the castle in this book as I fell in love with the Castello di Avio years ago on a study abroad trip. However, I didn't fall in love with anyone else. Emily, Simon, and Marcus were all right sods. Why did they get names but the castle didn't? The castle is the real hero of this book. It deserved a name and a happy ending where a billionaire decides to completely restore it to its former glory.

6/10, would not siege again. Thank goodness the title specifically says that it's the LAST siege.

Review for Elixir by Hilary Duff (yes, that Hilary Duff):

It's a tale as old as time: boy meets girl, girl dies, boy becomes immortal, boy follows reincarnations of girl around for hundreds of years even though his presence causes the deaths of girl's reincarnations. Which begs the question, does boy really love girl? I vote no. Unfortunately, boy grew up in the Renaissance and never got to take a high school health class about healthy love versus unhealthy infatuation.

Apart from the cringeworthy premise, Hilary Duff's writing is much better than expected. Good job, Miss Duff.

Review for The Kill Order, prequel to The Mazerunner, by James Dashner:

Let me start off by saying that I have issues with this entire series.

Despite a weak beginning and a weak ending, the meat of The Mazerunner was fascinating. I moved on to the other books in the series with a naive belief that the books would get better as I went on.

They did not get better.

I kept reading because at the end of The Mazerunner, Thomas swore he'd find Chuck's parents. I was interested in seeing the characters search for not only Chuck's parents but their own as well. But even though Dashner highlights this vow of Thomas's like it's super duper important, it never comes into play again. This is what the other two books were like:

THOMAS: NOW THERE ARE CRAZY PEOPLE!

THOMAS: NOW THERE ARE DESERTS!

THOMAS: NOW THERE ARE GIRLS BESIDE TERESA! NOW THERE HAS TO BE A HALFHEARTED LOVE TRIANGLE!

ME: So, uh, what about Chuck's parents?

THOMAS: NOW WE ARE QUARANTINED ON AN ISLAND!

ME: ...Chuck's parents aren't quarantined with you, by any chance?

ME: No?

ME: Okay then.

I decided to read The Kill Order because I thought it would explain how WICKED raised Thomas and Teresa to be so heartless that they would actually experiment on other kids. But noooo, instead I got a slow-moving book about all-new characters to which I had zero emotional attachment. Which was just as well, since they all die at the end of the book anyways.